The Love of a Father

I just got done watching the movie John Q.. you know, the one with Denzel Washington and it's the story where a father wants to die for his son? His son has an over-sized heart and is in need of a very expensive surgery, one that John Q can't afford. Not taking "no" for an answer, John takes the hospital hostage to operate on his son. Eventually he realizes that they need a heart to replace the over-sized one in his son, and John decides to let his son take his heart, to die so that his son can live... and with the obvious Christ-like implications in this story, I thought one scene was particularly interesting...

The doctor and the people in the hospital finally say to John Q (Denzel Washington) that he should just accept the fact that his son is going to die. But what does he say? He says his son is going to live, that he does NOT accept that, that he WON'T accept that.. ever. And it broke my heart.

It broke my heart because I began to think of how the conversation must have been like, in heaven, between our Father, the Son, and the angels. I began to wonder, "What must it have been like? What must they have said? What must some of the angels had said to Him?" To give up perhaps? To accept the fact that your children, that your sheep are hopeless, lost, and dead? That there is no turning back for them, that there is nothing that can save them... To accept that every last one of them will die, that every last one of us will spit in His face again if we had the chance... just forget it, it's not worth it, they don't deserve it... just face up, give up, and give in... For your children are lost... and can not be found.

To you who are reading this, I pray that joy, peace, and love enters your life... I pray that your heart breaks too, when God speaks to you (in all the ways that He does), that when you imagine how God must have stood up for us... tears of joy enter your eyes. How Jesus Christ, the Son, sitting at the right hand of God, must have stood up before the angels... and with power and authority, spoke to them... with nothing but pure... and true...



love.



His strength is perfect when ours is gone yes? His love for us is never-ending, it never fades, it never loses hope, it never fails us. It doesn't give up. It doesn't falter, it doesn't struggle, it doesn't fear, it doesn't regret, it doesn't doubt... it knows everything, it forgives yesterday, today and tomorrow... It gives us hope, it gives us joy, it gives us peace, it gives us comfort and shelter in times of hardship, it gives us unity... it gives us strength, it gives us purpose, and it gives us the truth. He is always there... watching us, with compassion and understanding, with love and mercy... He is watching us.

And through our denying of His love, through our denying of His existence, through our denying of the cross, through the suffering we caused by needing the cross, and through our cursing of the cross,

He was still hanging on that cross...

And so I hope that one day we all will see the cross, that you will see the dream that's been given to you, the road that lies ahead of you, and have the faith and courage that this great father had, and know that this faith started with God's faith...in you.

To end in His words,



"And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." -Jesus Christ

Ghost in the Mirror

I adore the shame and guilt of the weak. Can I help it if they print it all over their little faces? I like to bathe them in pity and narcissism, talking about how sad their lives have been, how terrible it was for them and how no one else is going through it but them. They think I'm their friend. It's what I do. At the end though, what I truly want... what really, really gets me fired up, is when they spit at their own reflection and take out that knife and pop open those pills... and say goodbye to the pain.

Because I am the Ghost in the Mirror, and I own every last one of them.

She never had too much to live for you know. It wasn't like I made her do it, we all have choices to make. I just pushed her in the right direction, that's all. It's not like that many people missed her after they found her hanging from an electrical cord, empty in her bedroom. For some reason, she had that crippling look in her eyes. That look where people could see the weakness and take out their own insecurities on her... spread rumors about her... even call her a whore.

And all the self-esteem she had in her was sucked dry by, well, yours truly.

It's like the ultimate lithium when parents don't care about their kids. Who needs drugs when you have negligent parents? And her parents even went so far as to set up strict moral guidelines to keep in the house. What's a 12 year old kid know? Discipline without love is punishment. Without love, rules are just a source of guilt and shame when they're broken. And they always get broken. How was she supposed to make friends coming from a home like that? Or get straight A's with no affection lingering from back home? I work well with parents like these. And more often than not, they had parents similar to themselves (though I never tell them out loud).

She sometimes prayed to God, but most of the “christian” friends around her were too shy to say anything, or too popular to risk anything. And it was real difficult getting through that thick European accent she had. And once all the rumors started, everyone wanted to join in. They didn't want to be left out, and they didn't want to be the one cast out either. The Simpsons weren't too far off when the people of Springfield were asking the man on the big t.v., “why should we listen to you?” Then the man said, “Because I'm a man on a big t.v., now listen up.” A person is smart, but people are sheep.

On rare occasions we got “those” kids who did end up blabbing about Jesus this, and Jesus that, He loves you, blah blah blah. But damn that name. I don't know a single demon out there on the field that doesn't shudder every time they hear it.

It hasn't been difficult getting kids out there to join our side either. Man they hear that word Jesus and curses just start flying outta their mouths. I mean they really, really hate it, and they don't even know why! How do you hate something you don't believe in? Curious, isn't it? That's exactly why my Father is called the Deceiver, the one who masquerades as an angel of light. I'm very proud of my Father. It was even him who thought of making “Jesus Christ” a curse word. And isn't it interesting that no other “god” in this world is used as a curse word, except for Jesus Christ? Genius I do say! I never would have thought he could pull that off, but Father said I needed more faith. Now almost every Hollywood star says it as a curse in every single movie. Makes him seem less real.

But the best way we've kept ourselves hidden, is how people have been fooled into thinking that only that which is visible can be reality, isn't it funny? They've forgotten that their whole lives revolve around the things that are NOT seen! Science, the laws of physics, gravity, chemistry, biology. The laws of induction and reason. The proof is everywhere. Love, the concepts of beauty and number, mathematics... they ALL follow laws that aren't visible. Heck, a person's name and their very being, isn't something that's touchable either. Sure you can touch their skin, but not even we care about a person's skin, because that's not who they really are. We care about their souls. We care about them.

So did you really want to hear my side of the story? You knew all this already. It's all in the bible and all over your television sets, your schools, your music, your news, your stupid faith. Oh, let me guess. You're gonna let people read my letter? Because your heart aches for those kids who hate themselves? Ha! You don't think I knew that prior to writing this to you? Go ahead! I'll tell them all about you. I'll tell them you're a freaking zealot, and they'll listen to me! They'll believe me. You know why?

Because they don't believe in me.

Sincerely,

-The Ghost in the Mirror